A couple of years ago my Grandma was in the hospital with a bad tear in her aorta. We didn’t expect her to survive it. So everyone who could, traveled to Ohio to say goodbye to her. I remember telling a friend, before I left, that I hadn’t talked to Grandma in months, even though I kept feeling God nudging me to do so. I felt so guilty for the time I wasted. My friend told me, “Emily, there is no time in heaven. When she gets there, she will turn around and you will be there too.”
Have you ever worried about forgetting the little things about a loved one once they’re gone? Parts of their character that gets lost among the depths of your memory? A certain tonal quality to their voice, the proud carriage in their posture, that certain twinkle in their eye.
Many times I remember – I just miss experiencing.
Every once-in-a-while, I get a patient in the office who reminds me of my Grandma. Such was the case today. I was taking care of an older lady today and was struck by the sound of her voice and the character she presented – it was like Grandma was peeking out through her to me. She even told me she had received a couple of epidurals due to her pain – like Grandma.
I miss my Grandma. Her wit, humor, pride. That twinkle.
God gave me a gift today. He reminded me that even though she’s in heaven, my Grandma is still very real.